Monday, March 30

Questions, pictures, and 11week thing...

There are two questions I wish people would STOP asking me.

1. Do twins run in your family? And I guess I understand the question... it's a practical question. Most times, if you have twins, they run in your family. So, yes, it is logical. But it gets annoying. Because when I answer no I either get an odd look OR I get the question: Was it natural? Then again, I guess I don't really mind that question either so much... as long as it comes from someone I don't mind sharing my IVF with. But when I don't want to share my IVF story with them, it's just kind of annoying.

2. Are you terrified? It's like I'm supposed to be terrified. And I guess I understand that... but, no, I'm not terrified. I am thrilled beyond belief. Don't worry-- I'm not under the mistaken impression that it will be sunshine and daisies and that every day will be magical. Far from it. I know that there will be many, many days that I want to pull out my hair, scream, cry... drop the kids off at grandma's for an extended visit. I know that, but I also know that it will be worth it. So worth it that there is no terror in me.

I don't quite know how to explain it. Maybe this will work... I went to Australia for 4 months. I am a homebody, but I had wanted to go to Australia since... well, probably since I learned that it existed. So when I got the chance to go, I applied and was accepted a few weeks later. There was no fear. I knew I'd miss home terribly, I'd be homesick... but I knew it would be worth it, so there was no fear.

Now, compare that to wanting to be a mom... I had wanted to be a mother since I knew what a mother was. And that was LONG before I knew what Australia was. Now, I tried to be a mother for much, much longer than it took me to get accepted to Australia. Therefore, there is no terror and no fear. It's what I ALWAYS, always wanted. I do not have delusions of it being perfect, but I know it will be all that I ever wanted. :)

Now, if you've read all of this, you deserve some pictures. These are from last Wednesday's appointment (3/25), not our high risk appointment today. We did get pictures, but Johnny has yet to scan them in. :) And, really, they look quite similar to the ultrasound pictures on 3/25.

The Twins!

Baby B!

And Baby A!

How far along? 11 weeks 2 days
Total weight gain/loss: I'm still pretty much the same.
Maternity clothes? I got a bella band knock off from Target.  Ahhh I love it.  :)  My wardrobe has quadrupled.  And I ordered a dress and pants from Old Navy.  
Stretch marks? Nada
Sleep: I desperately try to be asleep by 8:30 or 9... so usually 8-9 hours.  And I do love naps when I have the time!
Best moment this week: Either appointment... Wednesday's or todays.  I love both doctors AND I got to see the babies, so it's all perfect.   Perfect sizes, perfect hearts... just perfect.  I'm so in love.
Movement: Nope.
Food cravings: I found a yogurt I LOVE.  And still coolattas.  Everything else comes and goes.
Gender: I'm thinking a boy and a girl.  
Labor Signs: Noooo
Belly Button in or out? Innie
What I miss:
 Nada.  Like I said last time, I'm loving where I am!!
What I am looking forward to: Finishing trimester 1 so I can confidently make a registry and can just take a huge breath.  And I want school (grad and regular) to be over.  I just want to focus on the babies!!
Weekly Wisdom: Enjoy it!
Milestones: Isn't every day a milestone??  I'm just thankful for every day I get and every day that they are healthy.  Again I say, I am so in love.

Friday, March 27

Next appointment

Got the call today... our high risk assessment with the specialist in Boston is Monday at 2pm.  We get to see the babies again!  Wooo!

Thursday, March 26

Ugg Bug

So, first of all, my back hurts so badly.  It has just been my right side for awhile.  It felt more like a pinched nerve for the past 2 or 3 weeks.  However, now it has moved on to the left side as well.  It feels like a pinched nerve on the other side, too, but it also goes all the way across my back.  Oh well... I'll take it.  :)

Secondly... at school I have told 3 people that we're expecting.  The principal, my aide, and (though not voluntarily) the other K teacher (she happened to walk through the room while I was talking to my aide about my appointments).  Anyways, the other K teacher found out just days ago.  DAYS.  Apparently she has already opened her big mouth (someone else's words... not mine!) and told others.  Not only has she told others, but she has been loud enough and not covert enough that people JUST WALKING THROUGH THE HALLS have found out too.  Apparently people have been going to the secretary asking how I'm feeling.  Soo... I'm annoyed.

1. It's my news.
2. She can't keep her mouth closed.
3. I didn't want to tell people yet!!

And now I'm not sure if I should just give it up and tell everyone so that I'm not the topic of gossip for the few weeks or just pretend that I don't know everyone is talking about me. 

Wednesday, March 25

It's Done!

Oooh we had the big appointment with doctor number 2.  And let me tell you... I LOVE HER.  I love the whole practice... the nurses, the secretaries... even the blood lab nurse!  My doctor is fab... she's young and due to have her own baby in June.  I don't know... it was just a good experience.  So, she'll be out on leave from June-late August.  It all works out fine because having twins makes me have to go to a high risk doctor as well.  So, while she's gone I will see the doctor that I'm going to start seeing in 2 weeks.  It's a little bit of a bummer that he's in Boston so I didn't end up avoiding that drive, BUT I am so comfortable with my doctor that I don't mind.  And, because it's twins (yes, it still is!!) we're going to be getting lots 'n lots of ultrasounds!  Overall, I'm just even MORE excited.  

So... the ultrasound.  Yes, we did get one!  Both babies are still there and growing strong!  They measured at 10w3d.  I'm really 10w4d, but then the doctor reassured me that it was okay because she remeasured one of the babies when it had stretched a little and it measured at 10w5d.  Basically, the measurements aren't exact, BUT the babies are looking great!  We didn't measure the heartbeat (she did an external u/s), but we did get to see the little flickers so things are looking good!  :)

So, an appointment with the high risk guy in 2 weeks and an appointment with my regular doctor in 4 weeks!

And now we all breathe a HUGE sigh of relief!


Happy Wednesday!

A few tidbits while I sit and eat my lunch with the kiddies safely tucked away at their lunch...

1. My husband is by far the best person in the world. He's still not quite all there with "getting" my constant state of tiredness. I'm not sure he can understand it because he's the type that can get 2 hours and function just fine. But that doesn't stop him from being exceedingly amazing and putting up with everything that I want. (Meaning, things I want, but am too lazy to get for myself.) He's the best. Really.

2. 24 mentioned infertility on Monday... sort of. A security guard at the port mentioned that "getting pregnant is supposed to be the most natural thing in the world," but that it took him and his wife 3 years and all of their savings, and now they're expecting twins. Jack took pity and ended up saving him.

3. My parents leave for Floriday tomorrow. I can't remember where... Naples I think? I'm too jealous. Last we checked it is supposed to be 80. Ah... wouldn't that be nice?

4. Less than 4 hours til the doctor appointment! I am soo anxious/nervous/excited... you name it. I cannot wait. I don't care what goes on. I don't care if she sucks. But I cannot wait to see them on the ultrasound again. I just want to see the little wiggling blobs. That's all I want. I just need to know that they're both still in there and that they're both growing just as they should be. The only problem? I'm really not sure if I will be able to keep from telling everyone and their uncle assuming todays u/s goes perfectly. I just want to scream it to everyone. I cannot count the times I have almost slipped and told my kids at school.

Now, I know I had more insignificant details to ramble on about, but I cannot think of them for now...

Monday, March 23

Goodbye Food!

Ah, so last night marks the first time I have totally and completely lost my entire dinner. I was laying in bed, doing school work, half watching a movie, and eating leftovers that Johnny had heated up for me (he was watching something else in the other room... that's why I was in bed. I'm not really that lazy all the time!). About midway though the corn I realized that it just wasn't gonna stay down. And with that... at 10w1d I lost my dinner. I'm kind of amazed it took so long for it to happen... I've been feeling pretty crappy at night the past few weeks.

Come on Wednesday! I can't wait for you!!! :)

And for a 10 week thing-a-ma-bob...

How far along? 10 weeks 2 days
Total weight gain/loss: I think nothing... I am about 2 lbs up from pre-IVF weight though. But I don't think I've put anything on since that. I may have actually lost a little.
Maternity clothes? No, but I do only wear 2 pairs of pants over and over. My dressier ones aren't happening.
Stretch marks? Nope
Sleep: Usually 9 hours a night... :P More if I can squeeze it! (Last night I was in bed at 7:15!)
Best moment this week: Monday last week hearing the heartbeat. Imagining the nursery in the new place! Realizing that, no matter how quiet my dad is, he is thrilled beyond belief!!!
Movement: No
Food cravings: Coolattas, pretzels
Gender: 1 of each? :P
Labor Signs: Not for awhile!
Belly Button in or out? Innie!
What I miss: Absolutely NOTHING. I LOVE where I am right now!
What I am looking forward to: The doctors appt. on Wednesday! Can't wait to see the ultrasound!
Weekly Wisdom: I think the only advice I got came from my dad... when he said "My advice is to just eat what you want... but sensibly." Nothing too prophetic, but I think he was trying to make me feel better about wanting a Coolatta!
Milestones: Double digits in the weeks!

Saturday, March 21

Update of Stuffs... :)

Tomorrow marks Week 10.  Woohoo.   :)  1/4 of the way there!  Can you believe it?  

I'm still feeling good... just so, so tired.  Only occasional bouts of nausea.  Nothing horrible and everything totally worth it.  :)  

Today I spent the day with my mom.  It was a good day.  She bought me two maternity shirts.  Early, I know, but we're both just so excited it's hard to resist.  :)  We also looked at a bunch of baby clothes at Kohls.  We were looking for my mom's friend's daughter.  But the clothes were too cute.  (Though I may have been tempted, I did not buy anything!)  My brother and his wife also bought us 2 onsies that say "I'm the best".  They're cute... and our first baby clothes!  :)

Johnny and I are looking into where to move.  Johnny found a townhouse a few towns over.  It's brandnew, amazing price... it's a contender.  We're only looking for something temporary-- 4 years... 5 tops.  We want to be moved before the kiddies are in Kindergarten.  I can't wait to get that figured out.  :)  Such a huge weight will be lifted!

To end, I can't wait until Wednesday's appointment.  It's been almost 3 weeks since the ultrasound and I can't wait to see the little wiggling blobs.  When we went to the doctors on Monday last week we only heard one heartbeat... so though I'm not really worried (she didn't TRY to find the other) I really would like the comfort of knowing that they're both in there growing strong.  :)  That's all for now!  :)  Have a great rest of the weekend!

Tuesday, March 17

School Related Tid Bits

Tuesdays my kids have 2 specials.  Gym in the AM from 9:30-10:10 and Library or Music in the PM from 1:55-2:30.  Usually during the AM prep time I try to get stuff done because Darcy is there and she can help.  Today, however, we were talking about my appointment.  Picture it.  I'm sitting at my desk with my feet up on a drawer and Cheeze-Its in my hand.  (It was part of my snack!)  Darcy is sitting on one of the kids tables and we're talking animatedly.  At approximately that time, the principal along with 2 people I don't know come walking in.  Oops.  Becky comes in and asks where the kids are to which I reply (as usual) "I gave them away!"  No one laughed.  :P   Becky then introduced the people she was with as visiting teachers from a Boston Montessori school.  They come in look around and Becky says "I especially love helping in Stacey's room while she's working on reading and writing."  Then they awkwardly leave.  To which I ask Darcy "When has she EVER helped in my room?"  A few minutes later we walked to the office to talk to the secretary who informed us that the two teachers with Becky were a part of her interview for the principal position of this school.   Oops.  I hope I didn't blow the interview for her!  But, seriously, WHY wouldn't she have let us know ahead of time that the interview was taking place!?!

Next Wednesday, then!

My fantabulous husband agreed to take lead of the OB search. I know that sounds a little strange, but it's so much easier for him to make calls during the day and he's so much better on the phone. I'm likely to just say "okay" to whatever I'm told. I don't tend to ask questions and all that good stuff. But, he does, so he took over.

He scheduled us with someone who sounds pretty great for next Wednesday the 25th. It's a lot closer than the other OB-- closer even than RSC! Apparently he not only talked to a receptionist, but a nurse coordinator, too. So they took down a lot of the preliminary information and all that good stuff. He said they sounded knoweldgeable about infertility and IVF and were receptive to me being nervous and wanting an ultrasound early. The practice is affliliated with a big clinic near here so they not only have hi-tech dopplers in each room, they also have ultrasounds in each room. So, I'll definitely be getting an ultrasound on Wednesday! :) In general I'm liking the sound of this person. Obviously that could change when I meet her, but for now I'm happy with the decision. And if it falls through, then on to meeting number 3! The OB is also affliated with a Boston hospital which makes hubby happy. :)

Monday, March 16

The visit

So, the OB update.  The OB I went to today was a tad far away for my liking.  I have no idea how to get there-- the hubby drove me.  Would I enjoy going there on my own in the future?  Not so much.  When I first called a few weeks ago, I jumped at the chance to meet with this OB because (1) she was the only one who had someone answer the phone and wasn't at lunch! and (2) she was the OB that my RE recommended.  (And, I love my RE, whom my PCP recommended, so I figured recommendations were the way to go...)  Back to when I first called... this girl on the phone was a little rude it seemed.  Maybe I was being overly anxious, but it bothered me a little... but I pushed it out of my head. 

Today was the appointment... we got there at 3:20 for a 3:30 appointment.  First the girl at the desk was freaking out because she couldn't get my insurance to go through.  Which, of course, made me nervous.  Then we proceeded to wait... until 4:20ish.  Maybe that's why my RE recommended her?  My RE was famous for making us wait a LONG time.  Anyways, at 4:20 a nurse called us, brought us to a little cubicle room where she proceeded to leave us alone for another 10 minutes.  Then she came to get info from us... said congrats, gave us a bag of "goodies" and brought us to the room to wait for the doctor.  The doctor was with us... maybe 15 minutes.  She didn't really ask us anything about symptoms, our histories, etc.  It was a little off putting.  Then, at the end she said, "So, at 19 weeks you'll have your ultrasound and we'll also see you in 3 weeks for a routine visit."  I nearly fainted.  19 WEEKS!!??  So I mentioned that we had a miscarriage and that we were a little worried so could we, please, make it a little earlier??  She ended up putting us in for an ultrasound on Monday.  And then we left.

So, neither Johnny nor I were really feeling this lady.  Of course, we'll use her for her Monday ultrasound.  Other than that, though?  We're calling around.  Or, rather, Johnny is because all the doctors offices are at LUNCH when I am.  SO, that's Johnny's job.  Find a closer OB that I'll like.  :)

We did get to hear the heartbeat on the doppler, though.  :)  She only looked for one and then was unconcerned with finding the other, but it was so nice to hear, though!!  I cannot wait for Monday!!

Sunday, March 15

Odd and Ends...

The babies are looking like babies... according to the widget at least.  :)  I love it.  

I was just going through all the paper work sent from RSC (I didn't know what to ask for, so I asked for copies of absolutely EVERYTHING they had on me... and from there I weeded through it all).  Anyways... I was looking at the official ultrasound report.  I had it done at 7w3d.  (Side note: I can't believe it's already been almost 2 weeks since the ultrasound!)  The day of the ultrasound I was told that the babies were measuring at 7w3d and 7w5d respectively.  However, according to the ultrasound report, they were measuring 7w4d and 7w7d.  I know it doesn't make much of a different, but I found that interesting.

I have my first OB appointment tomorrow and I very excited.  No nerves.  Just hoping, hoping, HOPING that they give me another ultrasound.  Honestly, I don't know if they will, but it would be nice!  :)  Also, my RE gave me copy of all my copious amounts of blood work done recently, so hopefully I won't have to give too much blood tomorrow.  Can you believe that it's been like 3 weeks since I last gave blood??  That's got to be some sort of record!  

I'm honestly not quite sure how to calculate the days and the weeks.  I'm not sure if today is 9w0d or 9w1d or whatever.  Is there a WEEK7d?  Or does that just mean the NEXT week?   Oh well, I'm confusing myself, so I will stop.  I guess I should start heading to bed.  :)  I did take a 2.5 hour nap today, but that's never enough...

Wednesday, March 11

Nothing Special

Oh let's see...

Yesterday my aide got me two maternity shirts. A little premature, but the thought was nice! I tried them on and they are HUGE. She actually got me one size higher than I would have... but with twins I might need it! Ha. Johnny and I were at the mall on Saturday so I popped into Motherhood Maternity just to look around... because it's fun. I felt a little self concious being in there. Everyone else looked ready to pop! I just have to be patient... everything will come in good time!

I love the fact that the babies on the little ticker/widget thing are looking more and more human and less and less reptilian. :) Soon enough they'll look like little perfect babies. :) I go to see the doctor on Monday afternoon after school. I'm hoping she gives me another ultrasound despite the fact that I already had one at RSC. I can't believe it's already been a week since we saw those little beating-blobs. Can't wait to see them again!

Other than that, things have been uneventful. Sleeping and school work pretty much sum it up. I am also SO incredibly sick of this New England weather. I HATE IT. We have had so much snow it hurts. It was 60 over the weekend- beautiful. Monday? We wake up to snow/sleet/ice gross-ness. Where is spring!? My kiddies have been deciding if the days are lion or lamb days and then adding them to the calendar-- so far we only have 3 lamb days!

Sunday, March 8

Ultrasound Pics! 7w3d

Finally, as promised, here are some pictures!

Here is a group picture!  Baby A is top and Baby B is bottom.
They look so different because of the angles.
The gestational sacs are actually the exact same size.

And another...

Baby A hanging out.
You can see the little circle yolk sac on right right side.
He is a little smaller... measured exactly 7w3d.  

Baby B... the over-achiever.
Measured 7w5d.

Bits and pieces

I keep trying to start posts... I must have started a dozen over the past couple of days but then I run out of things to say.  I guess that's a good thing... things are pretty uneventful around these parts as far as baby-relatedness goes.  

I'm pretty overwhelmed right now... between teaching, my classes related to AYP, and then my grad classes... cooking, dishes, and my constant need to sleep I feel like I haven't been able to think straight in forever.  One of my classes is a Diversity class where I'm supposed to put myself into a minority situation for 3 hours and write a paper about how it makes me feel.  The initial "What I'm doing" paper is due Monday.  I have no idea.  Then in my other class I have to create a unit but I'm so out of my element.  The examples are for grad school and I am NOT writing a grad school unit.  So, instead, I'm thinking of doing one for K/1st grade.  Which is fine... except now I feel like mine is lacking substance in comparison.  (Because, really, you just can't do as much with 5 and 6 year olds!)

Speaking of 5 and 6 year olds... my kiddies continue to be cute.  The other day we were making a list of words that rhyme with "see".  I got tree and me and three.  Then I asked for a word that starts with "b" that rhymes with "see".  The answer my student yelled out?  "Sexy!"  Ha... luckily it didn't start with "b" so I could ignore her.  I also said "You should've" to a student in relation to something--- and he got mad at me thinking I told him to "Shut up".  As far as I know his parents weren't informed. 

Baby related... I can barely keep my eyes open any more.  I'm started to have bouts of horrible nausea.  Usually at very bad times... in the middle of reading a book to the class, while driving home... times like that.  But it does make me feel a little better... like something is still going on.

I'll have the pictures of the ultrasound soon... my brother scanned them all in on Friday night... he just hasn't emailed them to me yet.  As soon as I get them from him I'll post a few.

I guess that's all for now!  :)  Back to doing school work.

Wednesday, March 4

Where Have You Been?

Apparently my perpetual absences from school are not going unnoticed.  I was out because of the transfer, when I was sick, and then yesterday.  It just so happens that every other Tuesday I have been out- and my kids have library on Tuesdays.  So, yesterday when I was at the ultrasound the library teacher, Mrs. M., cornered Darcy (my aide) and asked "So, is there something that Stacey needs to tell us?"  Darcy was a little caught off guard and said "Uh... no...?"  Then Mrs. M. said "Is she going to make an announcement any time soon?" This time Darcy just said "I don't know what you're talking about." and left it there.  Sooo... I might be figured out.  But I think the problem is the the library is right across the hallway from my classroom... odds are Mrs. M. has heard Darcy and I talking.  

Johnny took the u/s pictures to his parents tonight, so I won't be uploading them tonight.  Hopefully tomorrow.  :) 

Tuesday, March 3

I Forgot

Two things I forgot to mention...

My estimated due date is October 17th.  Though they'll most likely come about 4 weeks early.

I have 3 or 4 left over cysts hanging out after the IVF!

A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words

Unfortunately I don't have any pictures because they're in Johnny's car... so here's my thousand words (though I'll probably get tired of writing much sooner than that!)

The ultrasound... *drumroll* showed 2 perfect, fabulous embryos.  According to RSC I am at 7w3d (I guess they calculate based on the actual IVF and not Day 1).  

Baby A was measuring right on target- a perfect 7w3d-er... the yolk sac, gestational sac, size, and heart rate were all perfectly aligned with a 7w3d baby.  (Heart rate was 149bpm).  

Baby B was fabulous as well.  This guy was a little ahead of 7w3d at 7w5d (Johnny says he's an overachiever).  Sizes were still fabulous and heart rate was 153bpm.  So... we have graduated.  No longer to visit RSC.  Though they will always hold a soft spot in my heart!

The ultrasound itself was awesome.  I was kind of in a bad mood at first because Johnny was 15 minutes late picking me up at school and I was worried about being late.  But then once the ultrasound started the bad mood went away.  Johnny was super excited and incredibly amazed (he had no idea what to expect!).  I on the other had wasn't quite as excited... just amazingly relieved.  The whole time it was like little bits of worry were falling away when all the measurements were coming out just right.  This isn't to say I'm not ecstatic!  I just needed the relief that the ultrasound brought.  :)

So, this are looking great and I am SOOO excited!  I don't have quite so much worry in me anymore!

I'll add pictures later-- promise!

Sunday, March 1

Simply Wonderful

And the verdict is... NO SCHOOL!!!  :)  Tomorrow school has been officially cancelled due to the snowstorm we're getting.  I guess we're supposed to get in the range of 1 foot or more.  :)

I'm loving the snow now, but I guarantee come June I'll be cursing it.  So far we've had 3 or 4 snow days.  We'll be in school until July.  :P

Then, Tuesday I go in for less than 2 hours, leave for 3ish hours and go back for another hour and a half.  Tough couple of days, don't you think?