Saturday, October 17
17 weeks ago when I was put on bedrest this day seemed so far away. It was a truly elusive goal. A day that I wasn't sure we would ever get to. Then, almost 13 weeks ago this day became just a milestone we wouldn't get to.
Today is the boys' official due date.
It's crazy to think about. I love seeing Colby thriving and beautiful. And 13 weeks old. But it also breaks my heart, as you know, because I know that I will only ever be looking at Colby. I will never be looking at Connor except for a handful of pictures. And Colby has already been through SO.MUCH. that he shouldn't have ever had to experience.
When we got pregnant back in February after the IVF there was no doubt in my mind that I was going to make it full term. I used to tell people that the average for twins was 35-36 weeks, BUT I really thought we would make it full term. As I've mentioned, I put my beginning leave date as October 5th-- over 38 weeks!
I order books for my classroom a lot online. I can remember looking at the website noticing that they were planning a Gala for October 24th and thinking that I would have just had my babies.
But here we are...
Colby is still doing great. He's still hanging on to the oxygen- low, low, low oxygen, but it's there. He was trialed off for 6 hours today and did great, but not quite great enough. We have been told we can take him home on oxygen if we want, but we haven't made our decision either way. As much as we want him home, it is so scary to make that decision... SO, here we are. 40 weeks with a 13 week old baby.